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February 28, 2005 Jay J. Pfeiffer Director Office of Education Information and Accountability Florida Department of Education 852 Turlington Bldg. 325 W. Gaines Street 32399-0400 Dear Mr. Pfeiffer: I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with a test you educational accountability types call the FCAT – Florida Comprehensive Assessment Test (FCAT). First, the name of the test is a sleight to my species. I think you should consider calling it the Florida Didactic Observation Gauge (FDOG) at least every other year to be fair. Second, I agree with those people who wear the buttons that say “Spay the FCAT.” You put way too much emphasis on standardized tests. It’s like if your pet iguana is shedding its skin and you bring him to a dermatologist who concludes that your iguana has a chronic skin condition. NOT! It’s just having a bad skin day. Well, some kids have bad test-taking days. And some kids can be very smart, but just get very nervous when they take these silly tests. (I admit this smartness category may not apply to my cousin’s son who ate a pound of my dry food before he heaved. Maybe he wasn’t going to do well on ANY test on ANY day.) Still, it’s a crazy amount of pressure on kids and teachers. This year for the first time you are testing elementary school kids on science. After all, they’ve been studying the topic for five months. The FCAT science practice test includes a doozy of a question that makes no sense. I showed it to a Ph.D. neurobiologist and even SHE couldn’t understand it! You’ve got a picture of a food web. I am a keen enough canine to know that the arrows on a food web typically flow the way the energy flows in a system. This doesn’t necessary make logical visual sense, however, since the prey usually runs AWAY from the predator. So on this diagram, you’ve got a rabbit, mouse and bird going TO a snake. Well, they deserve to die if they’re that stupid. And you’ve got a plant going TO a grasshopper and mouse. Is this a floating plant? One moving with continental drift? The question is which of the following organisms gets its energy from the bird: The grasshopper, the hawk, the mouse, or the rabbit? First, a hawk IS a kind of bird, so that might be a little confusing for some kids (and adults). Second, there is NO arrow that goes directly from the bird to the hawk. There are arrows from bird to snake, THEN snake to hawk. So it’s a little confusing and indirect. Plus, in nature hawks actually DO eat smaller birds like Tallahassee pigeons, so there should be an arrow directly from the hawk to the unnamed bird. What kind of scientific advice are you educators getting on these tests? Why are you trying to confuse little puppy-loving, sweet, innocent fifth graders?! And how long have your test developers had these sadistic tendencies? Also, are we afraid to use the real, raw words we’re talking about here; EAT?! Wouldn’t it be much more obvious to say which animal or animals EAT the smaller bird? When you guys are thinking about lunch in that slab of concrete you work in, do you say to each other, “Where would you like to get our energy today for the traditional noontime repast?” No, you say, “Where do you want to eat?” And you answer, “Wherever my miserly salary as a Florida state worker allows me… Hmm. How ‘bout the feed bag deli? Good energy for the money there.”
Kipper Moline 3436 Welwyn Way Tallahassee, FL 32309 P.S. I see your state education agency has at least three separate offices that deal with “evaluation,” “assessment,” and “accountability.” I wonder what the difference is between assessing and evaluating? If you assess and evaluate enough, are you then being accountable? When you are looking for a good accountant, do you evaluate her, or do you assess her? Can you account for your accountant. Is it the nature of bureaucracies to be redundant, repetitious, verbose and wordy?
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